In-Depth - Meet the Fockers Interviews

Interview with director Jay Roach

Q: Can you talk about the process getting this sequel made four years after Meet the Parents?

A: Well, when we started this, I wanted to find a way to make it seem like it was worth doing a second one.  And there was a kind of delicate balance in the first one, a sort of tension between De Niro and Stiller. And they resolved a lot of that stuff. So it was difficult to figure out a way to start it again without seeming very contrived. The trick, for me, was to bring in another force, and that's why I wanted the other cast members, Dustin and Barbra to play those characters.

Because I wanted somebody very, very strong to take him on. And Bob and I talked about it a great deal. And Ben and I talked about it a lot, too, about who would really be fun to go up against him. Who would the audience really enjoy seeing De Niro go up against? So once we decided that, that those guys were the right ones then it was just about the script. It was good at first but it took a lot of work shopping. And most of the hard work was the three personalities, well, the six personalities in the rehearsal phase. That's when it was really terrifying. Because I would bring them in, and we would just argue for two weeks straight about what the story should be and how the characters should go. It was a little bit of a corralling process because they all had ideas. They're all directors. They're all very opinionated. But I love that. 

I really requested and required that they just bring it on and tons of ideas. And we unraveled that script completely, by the time the rehearsal was over. So it was about getting them a sense of being playful, and try to just bring everything that you could possibly think of into it. And then sort of try to sort it all out, while they're all yelling and finishing each other's sentences, and cutting each other off. They were so much like off camera, like what they were on camera. And it was pretty easy to just kind of throw them all in, and watch that dynamic kind of go to town.

Q: How did you get Barbra Streisand to join the cast?

A: It took a while. It took some cajoling and a lot of rewriting. Because her natural issue was that the script really didn't serve that character as well as it wanted to, when she first started reading it. I started about a year before she actually agreed to do it, and with a whole other draft. I didn't, myself, love that draft. And we were trying to get her to do a read-through. And she couldn't really come to doing it. But I said, "I'll come back to you, with a better version of this character." I just kept coming back, and she kept saying maybe. 

She was very open about not wanting to come back, and kind of being comfortable in her life; enjoying sleeping late, and (laughs) just not interested really in jumping right back into it. But she was clearly intrigued by getting to work with De Niro and Ben Stiller, and she loved the first film. So, I sort of designed the character with the other writers, around what I thought she might be best doing. And once she saw that I was really committed to that, she agreed. But, only about four or five weeks before we started shooting. So it was a bit of a dance the entire year.

Q: What convinced her?

A: Well, the one scene that she finally said "okay, I get it", was the massage scene. When she knew she could take on De Niro and force him to come out of his thing, that it would be her responsibility in the story to loosen him up physically. And she had already pictured herself climbing on top of De Niro, and sort of throwing him around. Once she saw that, she was pretty ready to go. By then we had the first half of the script, and that scene. The whole second half of the script sort of evolved. But, once she had that scene, then she saw that we were on the right track.

Q: So was the massage scene her idea?

A: Well, we had a massage scene. But, originally it was Dustin who was going to massage him.  He was going to kind of wake up and be massaging his feet. And Bernie has so many other places in the movie to be overly physically. Then she said "there should be a scene where I confront De Niro. You know, there should be a scene where I and he sort of go at it. And I try to get underneath him. I'm a professional, I have a much more open lifestyle. And so, there should be a moment where that really clashes." And I thought "well, it would be great if it was this massage scene." So it came out of collaboration with her. I mean, this whole film was a complete collaboration from beginning to end. 

There's so much improvisation that went on in the process.  Not just in the shooting, but in the rehearsal phase, where we would come in and read the scene and read the scene, and read the scene. And they just kept throwing new ideas. Many of the big moments in the film evolved from that give and take. The writers, especially John Hamburg stayed with us the entire time. And we'd constantly fold the stuff they were coming up with in rehearsals into the process. And that continued right through. We wrote the third act quite close to the finish of actual shooting. We didn't have a third act when we started shooting. So, the cast came up with a lot of what happened in the movie.  

Q: Just watching the film, it seemed to be that, Dustin Hoffman, particularly, maybe also Barbra Streisand just felt so loose, that it must have been slightly improvised?

A: It was a little of both, rehearsals and improvising. Dustin is great, because he's desperate to make you laugh and shake you out of whatever your presumptions are about the way something's gonna go, both on and off the camera. He's always telling a story. He's not a prankster so much, as he's just always in your face with a new idea and a new joke and a new story. Literally, right until, I'm saying "action", he's still finishing a story. (laughs) You know, he's great and then he'll carry that into the character. So in a number of moments he's being particularly outrageous…like there's one scene where he explains to Blythe Danner and to De Niro that he conceived his son without full equipment. He came up with that in the rehearsal phase. So that was a Dustin Hoffman idea. And there's like a dozen of them through the story that he'd get big laughs and great moments in the film.

Q: Do you already have plans for the third Fockers movie?

A: Not yet. I'm always a little superstitious about that. If people seem to like this one, when it comes out, and there seems to be a need, we may start talking about it. The studio is always eager to jump into that stuff. But, I can't, it's hard for me to think about it when I just finished this one.

Q: Did you feel there was still mileage in the story?

A: I think the characters are good enough that people might want to see them get into new predicaments. But, again, it was difficult to come up with. It took three years to come up with an idea that was strong enough to make it seem like this one was worth it. Because I just didn't want it to be forced that, suddenly, Stiller and De Niro were at each other again. It just didn't make sense, since they were so resolved, after the last film. There was one key idea that did that for me. One writer, Marc Hyman, came up with the idea that he would have this grandson from another daughter, and he would be obsessed, kind of almost training that child, like the way he trained Jinx, the cat. And when I saw that I could have him have a new agenda, focused on his legacy and so, therefore he would be concentrating on how his own progeny, his own bloodline would be passed on. Then he's gotta worry about Ben Stiller's parents. Because they're gonna merge with his link and chain both culturally and physically, literally. And then he calls it,

"I don't wanna chink in the chain." He's really focused on how it's all gonna merge down the line, even after he's gone. And it's sort of a narcissistic place to be. But it meant Ben had to now prove something else to him which was that his parents would contribute and have contributed, through his bloodline, to whatever would the future be. As soon as I saw that, then that was my controlling idea. And everything else was worth it.

Q: Barbra Streisand’s clothes and her character’s whole attitude was very open. Was it her idea to have her hair on frizzy curls?

A: I have to credit her a lot on that. I told her I wanted the character to represent an openness and a tolerance of lots of different ideas or ethnicities and cultures. She, actually kind of derived the hair from seeing Dustin's wife, Lisa Hoffman, who has hair a little bit like that. The clothes came from a combination of, really looking at a lot of stuff in her closet, mixed with Carol Ramsey, who is my costume designer, and I sat and flipped through a lot of magazines to find a way to have her just seem somewhat intellectual, somewhat worldly, tied to sort of '60s and Zen and Eastern traditions. And we kind of just mixed it all together. But we worked really closely with her and her ideas.

Q: What’s the secret of your brilliant comedy?

A: I wish I felt that way more often. At the end of a film, especially after the first, Meet The Parents, I really recognized that something clicked. But I couldn't figure out what, (laughs) why it clicked. There are lots of good reasons for it. But the overall kind of gestalt of it, I never really felt in control of it. And I didn't in this one, either. So I often have to just scratch my head and say, "well, the most important thing, above all, is what everyone always says, a great script and, and the most incredible cast." I always reach beyond where I think I can go. We really never thought we would get Barbra Streisand. And I feared I might not get Dustin Hoffman. But I thought, "if it's gonna be funny, it's gonna be because they're strong enough and funny enough to take on Robert De Niro." So, it's, it's just casting and scripts, really.

Q: So, how does your persistence work? You talked how long it took convincing Barbra Streisand. How was it with Dustin Hoffman?  

A: Dustin was a lot easier and a lot more fun. I met with Dustin in his office. He was barefoot, then he put on his shoes, so we could go to the restaurant. He demonstrated that kiss he does, and he tried to get the waitress to do it. I mean, he is that person. And he said to me "I've never been allowed to play myself." He is that way with his own kids. He's that way with his wife. He's always nuzzling and being way too affectionate. He comes right up to you and he'll look at your face. And he'll give you advice about your skin. I mean, he has no personal space, boundaries, no inhibitions. When I saw that, I knew needed someone that you would both love and embrace, and he would stand for a loving, open thing, as compared to the closed, suspicious thing of De Niro's.  And he would do that in a way that would be both, even obnoxious, so that Ben Stiller would be embarrassed by it. But, also done in a way you wished that he was your dad. (laughs) You know, like you wished he was your father, who would be that aggressively loving to a fault, but to a virtue, too. And he was easy. And once he saw what I wanted to do with it, the deal was complicated. But, his commitment to it was instant, actually.

Q: Did the kid know how to speak before the movie or did he learn during the filming ?

A: Well, the kid was preverbal when we cast him. He was very sign proficient. That was one of the things we found, they had never been in commercials or anything. We found them, they’re from Sacramento. And I have tried this with my kids, too. There is a theory that if you teach your kid sign language, a few basic rudimentary things, like food and diaper, that they develop communication skills before they develop the coordination, physical skills so they can actually be very articulate in a certain way, and listen...

Q: Did it work?

A: It did work. And for our kids, they learned to talk quite quickly because they'd been doing this for a while. The mom, Wendy Pickren, had been doing this with these kids. So, they knew about 50 signs, when we cast them. But they had not spoken a single word. They had made noises. And they were starting to develop other words...

Q: When you say, kids, you mean more than one is in the movie?

A: Two, they are twins, Spencer Pickren and Bradley Pickren, who played little Jack, that's usually how you have to do it. Because there's a very limited amount of time you can have with them on the set. And we talked to the mom and said, "you know, how do you feel about teaching your kids this word?" It was a very, (laughs) delicate conversation. Because I have probably already corrupted children worldwide with some of the other films I've done. So they taught him a different word, which was ‘azzol’. They made it mean French fry, which is his favorite food.  And he just kept saying, "azzol, azzol." So we kind of slowly molded it. Frankly, by the end he was just saying the flat out, ‘asshole’.  (laughs) And it was too late. Mom was very good-natured about it. But I do fear for their future. (laughs) I'm gonna always look out for them, (laughs) if I can.

Q: Well, you're responsible for Fat Bastard, you can’t really sink lower than that, can you?

A: I can share a little of that with Mike Myers. But, yeah, I am constantly apologizing to parents who ignore the PG13 warning on the films.

Q: You seem to like to break the rule of filmmaking ‘never work with kids and animals’, why did you choose both?  

A: That's a good question. Bob is a really specific kind of actor who loves the external. You think of him as so method. But he really loves having external things to help him take the contrivance off of the way the lines are spoken. And he uses props that way. He'll spend a lot of time on props and wardrobe, so that he'll just have something to kind of obsess about, in the scene, to take his mind off the dialogue. And, in the first film, I was really worried about it, throwing this cat into the situation. Because I thought, "oh, he's never gonna like that, it's always gonna mess with his performance. It's gonna be doing bad things, but he's doing a good thing and vice versa." And he loved it. And he kept asking for it to be in more scenes. I realized that it was a way for him to kind of create a whole other reality. 

The plan with the kids was that that would do the same thing. Unfortunately, it didn't work out that way. He loved them, he really loved those kids and he spent tons of time with them in pre-production playing games and trucks, so that they wouldn't be afraid of him. And the first day we shot the head-butting scene, and Ben had to react suddenly, it scared the kid. And then Bob had to hold the baby and yell at Ben. And that scared the kid. From then on, the boys didn't really enjoy being around either Ben or Bob, (laughs) for the rest of the shoot. So we had to put them in kind of couples therapy. You know, trying to have them spend a lot of time together. And they did get better over time. But a lot of the kids' stuff was shot separate from them using over the shoulder shots and stuff like that. But he loves kids and animals. And that, that actually made, I actually think that rule is outdated, for me, at least. 

I'm always gonna have kids and animals, because it throws another wild card into the situation. The actors never know what's gonna happen next. They have to be incredibly good on the first or second take because that may be all you get with a little kid like that. And it's always something funny to cut to. Those kids were such great comic relief in the film.

Q: Were you intimidated by your incredible cast when you started filming?

A: I admit that, going into the film, I was terrified. People had warned me about having so many big personalities. What I discovered was that, although it was incredibly time-consuming, they all have ideas, tons of ideas, tons of questions. They're all directors. So you can't really slip something past them and manipulate them by only giving them part of the story. They know the whole story. For me the advantage is that they're usually ahead of me, because they're focused on their own character, individually,  and they're trying to figure out how the story will be told, filmically, as if they were directing it. It gets tricky when Dustin's sneaking over and giving Ben notes about his performance. Or, Barbra got an idea about, "would it really cut better if you shot it that way?" 

I tended to use, sometimes not a huge number of their ideas, but sometimes a lot of their ideas, and just trying to stay focused enough on the core idea, of what was going on in the scene that I could still make it make sense. I lost a lot of sleep. I spent a lot of time talking to them (laughs). But I knew it was gonna be like, literally, having a lion taming act, where you had four of the best lions in the cage, as opposed to, just one. And I felt like it worked out that way. One last thing I will say is that they were incredibly cool to each other. They performed for each other. They spent most of the time trying to make each other laugh, which added comic layers to the scenes. And then, also, made it much more enjoyable. I knew everybody was always like "oh, it's a big party on our set."  

It was, literally, like a troupe of circus performers always entertaining each other, always trying to cheer each other up. It was a pure pleasure. That dinner scene, we shot for four days, with them all sitting around that table, eating. And they could perform it, time after time after time, in big master shots. I have one whole master with that whole scene that could have just run without any cuts.         

Q: Are there a lot of similarities between Robert De Niro and his character, Jack Byrnes?

A: Well, you should ask him that. But it's interesting. A little is made up and a little is him. I think, especially in this film, a warmth comes out that I didn't see as much on the last film.  Because of what he's going through in his own life. He's been through transitions. And he's at that place where you're just trying to figure out what it all adds up to. And he's in a legacy phase, if you will. I think he got to a place of looking for more layers. He just seemed more confident somehow. And it was extremely cool working with him like it was last time, too. But I was afraid of him last time, really afraid of him. And I'd gotten to know him a little better on this one.

I was a little more willing to go up and say "you know, that thing where you told me how you were feeling about this other thing in your life. This is something pretty important happening. When you realize that everybody's lied to you, you're out of your own circle of trust, all that, that moment." And he was extremely…some of him is in that. The whole hard ass thing, that he is suspicious, he's a private person. But he's a pussycat.

Q: How did you direct him?

A: On the first one, I would hear myself, in dailies, giving him notes from off camera. And I'm just "oh, my God. Shut up."

Q:  How was it directing Barbra and Dustin?

A: Well, she was fun in a different way. They were both fun, they were actually fun as a duo.  The first time we met was in her house in Malibu. They had not seen each other, or talked much in a long, long time. And he came in and it was, right away, just you're so beautiful.  He was kissing her and they were doing improvisations sometimes in character, sometimes just off on their own. And she has the ability, she's a great comedienne. I knew she would be, I saw all her old comedies. But she has the improv ability that I don't think people are familiar with, which is to keep up with him. And he's great at it. Then, she is so smart as a storyteller, she can find a button on the comedy that actually concludes an improv. It’s very hard to find an ending in improvisation. That's a rare skill. She's amazing at it. A lot of the stuff that happened at that dinner scene, was her coming up with a kind of…she let herself kind of be on the verge of breaking up and laugh, being almost drunk. And that was the way she found all that, she came up with all that stuff on her own. So, I think they're both hilarious, and they should do more stuff as a comedy duo.

Q: What was Barbra’s contribution to the dinner scene? 

 A: She came up with this whole thing of being so out of it, that she could start laughing while she was telling a story of the circumcision. And the idea of arguing with him (Ben) "you slept in our bed until you were 10", and he goes "I don't think I was." "Yes, you were", "No, I wasn't", "Yes, you were". She would come up with things, and then she would turn to Jack and go "He was." And she'd find the ending of it, which is just a rare thing. Usually, I have to do that editorially. But with her, I could just let her run, and count on her to finish the joke in a very funny way.

Interview with Barbra Streisand, Dustin Hoffman & Ben Stiller
Q: Barbra, how was it the night before the shooting started, did you get any sleep when you had to wake up 5 a.m.?

B: I can’t remember what happened the night before. I really don’t like getting up 5 a.m. I like to stay up late because it’s quiet and there are no phones ringing, and I can read and think and play computer games.

Q: I really meant that were you nervous?

B: Yeah, I think I was. It’s been awhile and I really wanted to see what that felt like again.

Q: Ben, this is a heavy weight cast. Who was the most intimidating one to work with?

S: Very quickly after meeting Dustin, the whole image I had of him was shattered. I was intimidated by the idea of working with Barbra, Dustin and Robert, but it left very quickly after we went into rehearsal, after a couple of days, we were all just actors sitting around, trying to make this thing work. And I felt a very warm feeling from both Barbra and Dustin as parents (Barbra touches his hair). There’s a lot of physicality, and Dustin would do that to me too which wasn’t quite as nice.  

Q: Dustin and Barbra, how are your own parenting skills?

B: (turns toward Dustin) Honey?

D: I’m somewhat unconventional as a parent. I once had to talk in a college one afternoon when my son was about 15. He wasn’t there, but after the talk I left, and outside the science class which was next door to the room I spoke, there was a case of condoms affixed to the door.

B: He loves to talk about condoms.

D: Well, yeah because when I grew up we all tried to avoid the word and say rubbers.

B: Or plastic (laughs)

D: So I can say it now without getting shocked to the system: condoms. And I took the case of condoms and I went home. My son who is now 23 was on the phone in his bedroom and one day I was going to have a sex talk with him, but I just opened the door, walked in while he was on the phone and dumped the condoms on his head and walked out. That was me giving him the sexual education, and that’s the character.

S: I wish my father had done that to me.

B: I don’t think we as actors sit and think consciously about…so much of it is instinctive and visceral and you bring what you know and observe in other people to a character. It’s hard question to answer: How do you bring your own parental skills to a role?

Q: But sometimes you must have thought you wouldn’t have been reacting the same way in real life?

B: In reality too, I’m in love with my dog Samantha because there is a way I speak to her (uses Ben Stiller as a prop): "You the poodle, good morning (with baby talk voice while scratching and petting Stiller)", so I thought that’s the way I would love my son. And my dog is right outside (they bring her in and show to everybody. It’s a white, middle sized poodle).

Q: Ms. Streisand, can you talk about your look in the movie?

B: First thought I had since I was going to be Ben’s mom and he has dark, curly hair (Ben: "At least in the movie") so I thought that I want to look like him. I have a 6 year old god daughter, she has very curly, longer hair and I just thought that they were stuck in the time zone of the 70s, so I guess instinctively I started to dress like her and look like her. Then when the movie was done and I was looking at the poster, I was thinking that looks so familiar to me. Then I thought, that’s how I looked in A Star is Born and that was in the 70s but I didn’t think about it consciously before the movie started. But then I had a perm (in this movie she wears a wig).

Q: Mr. Hoffman, you became grandfather yesterday. How does it feel and do you have any parenting tips to young parents?

D: It’s time for me to be a grandfather (laughs) before I’m dead. It didn’t hurt me. The cliché is, we hear people who are about to become grand parents say "I don’t want to be called grandpa or grandma!" But it’s fun, it’s wonderful. It’s an extraordinary feeling because you get closer to your own mortality, and the grandchild, they say, you skip the generation. In other words; you are more like your grandparents than you are like your parents. That’s what you hear, right?

B: No, I never heard that.

S: No, me either.

D: So, when I look at Gus, that’s his name, and I can see that he’s got my stuff. It’s a feeling, I must say, that is different from what I have with my own children. I think they have my stuff too but the magic is…and he’s got more stuff. It’s wonderful and I can’t express it in words.

Q: Ms. Streisand , you have a grown son in real life too. How is he doing and how proud are you of him?

B: He is doing very well. As a matter of fact he is an incredible artist. He’s made films and one of them appeared in Sundance, he’s very gifted and he can write music. He became a wonderful artist around 15 and now he designs wonderful cards that can be a book or whatever, that are called ‘Straight Words’. Hopefully he is going to come out with them. They are incredible sayings that are then drawn; like Jason draws a wonderful picture of a man’s face with a tear, like Picasso, it’s so beautiful and it says on it ‘the purity of sadness will never lead to madness’. So they are thoughts with drawings.

D: One more thought, I feel exactly like both the Fockers feel: you cannot give a kid too much love. Impossible.

Q: Did you talk about politics during the shoot or did the political stuff come out in some other ways?

B: We all appeared at the same fund raiser for John Kerry, put it that way.

S: But it definitely came out a few times in rehearsals, it wasn’t intentional, it just came out. Because we’ve been working on the movie for 3 or 4 years, I guess 3 ½ years in terms of Jay trying to get the script to a place where it’s supposed to be. It was always in the original idea of the movie that Greg’s parents were very different from the Burns’s.

Q: Was it always a sure thing that you were going to do the sequel?

S: Not until we had a script that everyone thought was funny and good. That’s why it took a while. Because right after we shot the first one they started to work on another script and it took a number of tries and different writers to get to a place where everybody felt that we should be.

Q: Were you excited to get Barbra and Dustin as your parents?

S: Extremely. We wouldn’t even believe it that we would…when we talked about who the parents would be, Dustin and Barbra were high in the sky ideas of who we’d like to see.

Q: Did you at any stage consider using your own parents as parents in the movie?

S: I let the casting process happen with Jay and the producers. I was not going to be the guy saying "hey, hire my parents!" I think it would’ve been a little bit crazy going to do a movie with them, for me, on a certain psychological level. It could be a little bit confusing. In terms of the relationship with my folks, it’s like Barbra said, you don’t even think about it but this really is drawn on the realities of your life and stuff. So, like Dustin says how he likes to be touchy-feely and invade my space to get me crazy, my dad does that. It’s just loving, pure loving, smothering thing that sometimes kids are like…and you don’t understand it until you have a child of your own, that feeling you have as a parent. I have a 2 ½ year old, and all I want to do it hug and kiss her, and she’s already getting enough of it (laughs). You don’t understand it as a kid until you have one of your own.

Q: Dustin and Barbra, how did you keep up the physical, horny energy on the set?

B: He doesn’t have to work on it! It’s natural.

D: (bangs his hand under the table) When I read it and we talked about it and that she’s a sex therapist, and I talked with Jay and I always go by what I don’t like in the movies that I’ve seen. And most of the sexual play I’ve seen in movies is crap, I don’t believe it: tongue down the throat, and there is always a montage scene where the camera pans past her panties and up to the bed and he’s on top of her and then suddenly you see a flip over and it’s always the same. So I thought what can we do that’s honest and Barbra and I know each other since the beginning of our careers and personally we have an affection toward each other and we thought the same, that sex is not really sex in the literal sense. It’s this: (he starts kissing and hugging and touching Barbra). It is and you’ve never seen that.

B: It’s very natural and it’s also about kindness. I think that Dustin is very kind and supportive because we were improvising a lot as actors and people. In other words; if I say something in the scene that’s not written in the script, he says "listen to her, she’s right". That’s a very kind thing to do in a marriage, to support your spouse and it’s also kindness from Dustin towards Barbra. It is real.

Q: You’ve known each other for a long time but you haven’t acted together before. Did this change your relationship?

B: We’re leaving our spouses and running away together!

(laughter)

D: That’s a good question. We never socialized in all the years we knew each other. I came to see her in concerts, but we never…I’m busy doing my stuff, she’s busy, I’m on one coast, she’s on the other. I don’t think either of us is party people, she loves to be at home and that’s the same with me. But there was always a familiarity about us, and since the film, it becomes very intimate working together every single day, it’s interesting that the familiarity is the same as it was; it was rich and deep then as it’s now. It’s no different. We hang together, so to speak.  

Q: Do you remember some jokes you made together in the acting school you attended at the same time?

D: We tease each other now because I have said in the past that we met at the Theatre Studios in New York where we were both janitors cleaning the toilets and she hates when I say that!

B: Well, he was kind enough to be at my AFI tribute and he tells the story, but the truth is that he was the janitor who cleaned the toilet bowls, I would have never cleaned the toilets! I was baby sitting to pay for my lessons. We had ‘a work scholarship’. So I called him up after the AFI thing and told him "don’t say that I cleaned toilets with you, I didn’t. I was a baby sitter". But he said "yeah, but mine is a better story." But I said that I believe in the truth.

Q: Jay Roach said that the massage scene with Robert De Niro was the one that convinced you to take the role?

B: Because I told him that there was no contact between my character and De Niro’s character in that script I read a year ago, so I suggested what if I was somehow sexually massaging him or…I had to have some interaction. If you have me and De Niro in a movie, you have to have something, so they wrote the massage scene.

Q: What kind of research did you do for it?

B: Well, I love massages, so I worked it out the night before with my own masseuse, the choreography for the scene so we could repeat it over and over again. But I had to watch tapes of sex therapists and they are very funny, just funny because it’s so matter of fact, so practical, so pragmatic.

What is lovely about our relationship in the movie, is that in real life, later in life when you are in a relationship, is to keep it hot, to keep it sexual, to never let that die because it is a life force and it’s fun.

D: Before the movie started or just after it started Barbra and I talked about "so, how much sex do you get?", and we confessed that between the two of us we get about 7 days a week of sex. I was once and she was 6 times.

B: (keeps saying ‘watch it’ while D talks, then starts laughing) He makes up stories!

Q: Ms. Streisand, do you have any plans for new albums or concert tours?

B: Well, Barry Gibb is writing a new album that we are doing together. Somebody suggested to do an album with songs from different countries from the world and that would be a good idea, so maybe a Brazilian album. I would never do a concert tour again like I have done in the past because they took too much energy singing 30 songs a night. But when I did this Kerry, little concert, I said that "I’ll do this but I can’t get off the floor, I can’t walk around too much, go up and down elevators and singing that many songs. If I sit on a stool and sing, I can manage that." So that’s the kind of thing I could do.            

Q: Barbra, do you have plans to direct again?

B: I like directing and if I direct, my next picture will be without acting in it. I would like to have the experience of just directing and not having have your hair done and putting  make-up on and learn lines. That would be a thrill, but I’m not looking actively for it but if it comes my way and it’s something I feel passionate about I’ll do it.

Q: Does sex get better with age?

B: Definitely. I think it does. You get freer; less inhibited and you really enjoy the enjoyment and as you said, there is a sense of mortality and it’s like living each day to the fullest and experiencing the body.

D: Unfortunately when I started out with sex, when I was a teenager, I was what we call in this country a premature ejaculator. Once a premature ejaculator, always a premature ejaculator. But the benefit is that when you get to be as old as I am, you’re still a premature ejaculator but it takes about an hour.

(lots of laughter)

B: Very funny! (laughs)

Q: Dustin, how was it to play yourself in a movie?

D: My kids saw some rushes and they said "Dad, this is the first time you’re being dad the way you are at home."

Q: Miss Streisand why did it take so long for you to accept the role?

B: Because I’m having good time doing things that are not judged, that don’t have to be judged; gardening. Actually I was judged because I have a rose named after me and it just won best fragrance. It’s called Barbra Streisand and it starts out as burgundy and it changes to mauve with edges and it becomes lavender. It’s very beautiful rose. So, the point is that I am having good time staying home being with people I love and building a house, designing a house, constructing. Building a house is a very creative experience; it is like making a movie. 

I didn’t miss work and I think that when you are happier in your life you don’t have this feeling of sublimation like there is a void in my life so I have to create something, like a movie or an album. So I resist work. I’m just lazier. Well, I do write on my political web site. But I really love to be wanted and a lot of people are intimidated by me, especially directors. And Jay wasn’t at all, he’s just so collaborative and open to ideas. I think that’s a sign of true talent; when you are not afraid of other peoples’ opinions. You want to take from them.   

Q: You said that you don’t want to be judged…?

B: Yeah, I read articles, today I don’t care as much, but you read articles about yourself sometimes and they call you egoistical but I hate talking about myself, I hate having interviews; you’re asked to talk about yourself and then you’re called egoist. If you make a movie and you have to direct and star in it, as a woman I think you are more harshly criticized…

D: Well, if a guy is strong and tough, they say "well, he’s strong and tough" and if a woman is like that she’s a bitch. That’s how it translates.

Q: That’s why Martha Steward is in prison, isn’t it?

B: That is so true but her stock is going up.

Q: Going back to the massage scene. As Ben Stiller put it in the movie: How was it riding Robert De Niro like Seabiscuit?

B: It’s hard work, I sound like president Bush (laughs), it’s hard work but somebody has to do it. (lot of laughter) We worked on that scene like 16 hours straight, I think. That was tough, just difficult work.

Q: Did you hurt him?

B: I hurt myself, my wrist and my back.

Q: It looked like you had great time doing this movie, does it mean that we are going to see you more in the future as an actress?

B: I don’t like working that much. I don’t like getting up early in the morning. I like playing the stock market in the morning. That’s at 6:30 a.m., I’m tired by 8:30 a.m., I’m finished playing the stock market. Then I have to go to sleep for a while. I read the newspapers at night, so I don’t have that much time to go to work. I’m working (laughs).

Interview with Robert DeNiro & Blythe Danner
Q: Mr. DeNiro, Jay Roach just called you a pussycat. How do you feel about that?

DN: Well, uh, it’s okay. Jay’s a terrific director and terrific person, and we are all lucky to have him to be the director of the both movies.

BD: He is a pussycat (laughs).

Q: There were two methods of child raising portrayed in the movie. Which method do you prefer, the more disciplined one of the Byrnes’ or the ‘you can’t love your child too much’ of the Fockers’?

BD: For me it was the Fockers, actually, personally.

DN: Me too.

Q: Mr. De Niro, the director said that because of the things that happened in your own life you were more willing to think about your legacy. Having had a reminder of your own mortality, has your look on life changed?

DN: Probably. A little bit. You just realize that life is moving on and you just have to make decisions, if you are going to do something, you better do it now as opposed to thinking that you are going to do it later and 10 years go by and you are "I didn’t even do that thing I always wanted to do" and stuff like that.

Q: Ms. Danner, you became a grandmother recently, how do you feel about it ?

BD: Ooh, need I say more? (laughs) Just look at my face. It’s an extraordinary experience. All of my friends who are grandparents have been saying "just wait" a bit cynically, but it’s just extraordinary. You feel like a child again yourself. Just walking on air, it’s wonderful. And of course you feel responsibility. I think after the election we’ve been so depressed and so upset (laughs), we have very little to look forward to in a way that I feel that it’s our children who do give us hope because they are the ones who are going to save the world. We’re trying our best but not having the best luck at the moment.

Q: Mr. De Niro, are other actors intimidated by you?

DN: When you work on a movie day after day, that goes away, just everybody’s working together. The relationship as characters towards each other was supposed to be like that, but as far as actual intimidation other than that, Ben and I are past that point. Working day after day you don’t have much time for that.

Q: How was it having Barbra Streisand riding on your back?

DN: Well, it was interesting. She worked hard on that scene, I tell you. She felt like she worked out. That’s one scene we worked on a lot.

BD: She gives a good back rub.

Q: Was it your idea to have the artificial boob and how did it feel?

DN: No, it wasn’t. I don’t know where that came from. It came from John Hamburg and Jay probably or one of the other writers. I'm not sure but that wasn't my idea.

Q: How did it feel?

DN: It felt kind of weird but it was funny.

Q: In addition to being an actor you are also a successful restaurant owner. Which work is your passion?

DN: I love acting, that’s what I do and directing, I do less of that obviously. And the restaurant stuff has become very successful and I did that just because I like good food. That just evolved.

Q: What is your most embarrassing parent related incident?

BD: I guess when I was at a party with my daughter who was about this tall (about 120 cm) and we were at an opening, and I kept seeing this little hand coming up towards the champagne tray. I kept thinking "who is that?" I had to carry her home on my shoulder. I hadn’t paid close attention (laughs) and she was having a good time.

DN: I can think of when I embarrassed my kids, they don’t like to see me act silly or act funny.

Q: Do they watch your movies?

DN: Not yet, my younger ones are not ready for that.

Q: In what ways do you act silly?

DN: Oh, dance around, singing and act silly. They’re embarrassed by that, especially if I do it in front of friends.

Q: Mr. De Niro, some people say that comedic acting is actually more of a challenge then straight dramatic acting. What are your thoughts on that?

DN: Well, in some ways it depends on what the part is and what the situation is.  I think with the comedy that I feel that I can do the way I do, it's fun to kind of make choices that you can't do in a dramatic situation because it would be funny, so, whereas you could do something that would be dramatic and at the same time you could put a little spin on it and you get away with it because it's meant to be funny, if that makes any sense.

Q: Jay Roach said that each of you contributed to the story. Is there a specific scene that has your fingerprints on it?

BD: Well, as Bob was saying before it's such a collaborative effort so many things came out of just, you know, improvisation and talking. Like one particular moment, I just worked on being a very life affirming, kind of good peacemaker in the family but a specific piece of business I can't put my finger on.

Q: Mr. De Niro, do you still have to work on the character and rehearsing beforehand?

DN: Yeah, of course.  That doesn't change.

Q: De you have any plans for producing and directing?

DN: We're producing a few things which I, at the moment, don't have the names in front of me but we are doing, still doing a few things including The Good Shepherd that I'm going to direct, and Rent.    

Q: Are you a cat or a dog person?

BD: Dog.
DN: I like dogs and cats.                                                                               

Q: Is there a specific scene where it was very hard for you not to stop laughing while filming?

BD: The toilet. The dog in the toilet scene. (laughs) Even though I love dogs it was just hilarious, it was beautifully edited.  It was very funny.

DN: Oh, Yeah. No. Some scenes we would do we'd break up, I'd forget there was something…one where Ben and I were talking about his family at the night before party and we were sort of improvising and we were both doing it very straight, you know, and I was as the prospective father-in-law and we were sort of riffing, or whatever on the names of the character’s relatives. It was just very funny, at least for us it was. Couldn't stop, couldn't control ourselves.

Q: This is the second time you do a sequel to a comedy. What about your dramas, is there any character you would like to revisit?

DN: I was thinking once with Marty Scorsese about doing sort of a, I guess you'd call it a sequel to Taxi Driver where he's older and so on, but we never could come up with the right way to do it, so...

Q: Does that mean it might happen?

DN: I don't, I don't know, I mean, it sort of fizzled out.

Q: Both Meet The Parents and this sequel are good studies in a comedic way about parent-children relationships. Did you draw from your own experiences and could you identify with your characters?

DN: Sure. I'm not like the character the way he is but I could understand it. But I'm not that kind of a parent with my own daughter.

Q: Are you less over protective?

DN: I'm protective, of course, but not in that way.

BD: Not militaristic. Not militaristic.(laughs) I wish I was as uncomplicated and just purely loving as Dina, I think I have a lot of, lot of crazy layers.

Q: Mr. De Niro, you said you're not like the father in this movie but still one day your daughter will come home with a guy. What are going to put him through and are you ready for that?

DN: No, I get along very well with my daughter's fiancé so I haven't, you know… We are okay, I mean, sometimes, some people I've met I wasn't crazy about but I'm very careful to preserve my judgment until the right time. Cause it's, it's their life and I have to respect that.

Q: A lot of people seems to be intimidated of you. Even Jay said that, the first time he directed you in Meet The Parents he didn’t dare to give you any direction.  How is it to have that affect on people?

DN: Once you start working with people that goes away.

Q: Your daughter's fiancé was probably scared out of his pants at once?

DN: Well, he might have been, I don't know but we have a great relationship.  We're always kidding each other and we sort of play on that stuff at times but, but...

Q: Are you frightened of him, Ms. Danner?

BD: No, I'm not. I was initially. (laughs)

Q: How did you solve that?

BD: I just did a lot of stroking. I feel good when I pat and hold somebody.

Q: Did you end up becoming your own parents, did you become like your mother and did you become like your father?

BD: In some aspects yes, others no. You know I was raised in a time where children were still seen and not heard basically, so I think a lot of us in my generation went the other way and just tried to be as much more liberal and open and we're still paying for it.

DN: As I get older I see certain things that I'm like them. And you always say, well, I don't want to be like them in certain ways but you get older, certain things are ingrained in you in a, in a way. So…

Q: Mr. De Niro, how was it working with Mr. Dustin Hoffman?

DN: Dustin is fine. We've done two movies together, this is the second, and, you know, it's fun.

Q: In what ways?

DN: He has ideas sometimes, he'll think of something or change it and that's just the way it is. There is nothing that unique or different. He is different than I and all of us. Dustin, the way he works, and he's kind of nutty in some ways. He does things to break the tension. He'll try and he'll burp or fart, excuse my French, and stuff like that, he's done that.

Q: Mr. De Niro, you've been acting for so long and you’ve done many amazing characters. Is there still a role you want to do in the future?  

DN: Yeah, but I can't think off hand now what they'd be. I'm not sure, but I know that there are things that I'd love to do but I can't figure it out.                               

Q: Mr. De Niro, you have been in more comedies than in dramas lately. Does that mean that you are taking yourself less seriously nowadays or that you're getting funnier?

DN: Well, I've done things over the years that were funny characters, that had a certain irony and the humour in their behaviour, so this is going further of being an outright comedy but I always felt I had a good sense of humour about things, and I see the irony in the behaviour of certain characters no matter how serious they may be or how seriously they take themselves.

Q: Why do you want to direct?

DN: For me it keeps my mind occupied in many different ways. It's a lot of hard work but I like to do it.

Q: Is there an actor who could possibly intimidate you?

BD: Well, he was, yes, that would have been him but I've gotten past that, so, no.(laughs)

DN: Yes, Blythe. No, not that I can think of anybody.

Q: How difficult was Barbra Streisand to work with and how easy it is to work with Ben Stiller?

DN: Barbara was great and Ben is great. He's very funny, he's terrific. We all had a good time.

BD: Yeah, I've known Ben since he was little boy. So, I'm friendly with his parents. It's wonderful just to have seen him evolve into this fabulous actor. Barbra, I had the good fortune of being directed by several years ago in Prince Of Tides and she is incredibly generous just as she is as an actor, I mean there is something about having an ear like hers to the musicality, it just leaves her naturally to wonderful directing as in acting. So much of it is, I think, music driven.

Q: Is the rumour not true then that she’s hard to work with?

BD: I think she is a perfectionist and when she is working with a team that is less than perfect she's probably demanding and has every right to be. ‘Cause she's very smart she knows what is needed, not only for herself but she's generous, for the whole. She's very much aware of the whole and how everyone works together, I think that's what makes her so great.

Q: Do you ever think about retiring from the acting business? 

DN: No, I don't know. I used to see actors say, "I'm going to finish, it's over." Then they go back anyway two years later or three years later, so, I'd never say that. And I don’t feel that.  Sometimes I'm tired, you know, fed up with certain things but, oh, well, it's too complicated to go into.

Q: How was it playing mother to your real life daughter on screen and would you like to do it again?

BD: Yes, I forget that she has such an extraordinary talent, that I forget when I'm working with her that she's my daughter. I've done a few things with her now and I'm off camera giving her, her lines for her close up and I remember once I actually went "who is this girl,? Oh, my, this is, it's my daughter, yeah."  It's a joy to work with her. Yeah.

Q: Since you have such a history with your name what do you think about Gwyneth  continuing with exotic names like Apple?

BD: I know, and then we have Julia Roberts with Hazel and Phinnaeus. I just think it may be people who are creative or think we're creative. Speaking of myself they certainly are or there's just an attraction to something that's unusual and I was attracted to Gwyneth from a school friend who was British. I was six years old and she was very eccentric and had a beautiful English accent and when the time came, I just named Gwyneth after that. I got a lot of guff for naming her Gwyneth.

Q: I bet Gwyneth isn't eccentric at all in Britain. You know that?

BD: No, but it is in here, and actually Apple I think, also I hear it's more common in Britain, as in Pear, there more fruit names in Britain.

Q: Would you discourage your children to act?

DN: Well, I wouldn't discourage him if that's what he wanted to do. I'd just tell him what the down side is and what the upside is. It's hard when you're starting out and if he's my kid, there's a lot of loaded stuff coming in. You know, going for an audition and people will do it out of respect or just as a courtesy, but it doesn't mean…it might even work against him, there's all that kind of stuff. But I would never discourage them, I wouldn’t have the right to do that. I would encourage them.

Q: Mr. De Niro, I just wonder would travelling around in a big motor home be an option for you, would you ever think about taking your daughter and your future son-in-law for  a trip across country?

DN: I thought of it. I know some people who have done it or who do it, but I thought of it but then thinking about it and doing it is another thing, you know. I don't know.  Not, not such a big motor home maybe a little smaller.  Maybe. in another country, or Europe or something.

Q: Was there a clash of the Method titans on the set? Like was there any competitiveness in the football scene?

DN: No, I think Jay shot that very quickly, actually. It wasn't like with the children, if he got a good take he knew he had a good take. We didn't labour it and go over it and over it and over it, you know.

Q: Is Dustin Hoffman a good neck kisser?

DN: Yeah, he's a good one.

Q: What was that experience like?  

DN: Well, it was supposed to be discomforting, so, I played that.

Q: As an Italian, are you used to kissing men on the cheek?

DN: (laughs) Sometimes. Kissing men…

Q: Mr. De Niro, do you have any plans to work again with Martin Scorsese?

DN: Yeah I would like to do a few more movies with Marty. There’s nothing concrete yet. We've talked about things over the years and, and I would like to do couple of more films with him.

Q: Ms. Danner, what are you doing next because your pager has been going off every few seconds, I think there’s a very big offer coming up?

BD: No, I don't think so. I've just had a fortunate year of playing many different women which I love. At my age in Hollywood it's very difficult in television especially. I'm very grateful for this job because I don't get an opportunity to do a lot of features, but in TV I've been playing a lot of different women.

Q: Would you like to make a third part of this movie?

BD: Yeah, we were talking about the title, we would call it the...

DN: Meet The Little Fockers, I think (laughs).

Q: What did Barbara Streisand whisper in your ear in the scene where she gave you some sex tips, we did see the results after all?

DN: Well, that's the point. You have to figure it out. You can put in whatever you want.

Q: But did she say anything?

DN: She might have, I think, when we were kidding around, yeah.                       

Q: Which are the sort of comedies you prefer whether it be Billy Wilder or Alexander Payne or something else?

BD: I like Billy Wilder a lot and I think one of my very favorite films of all time was with Peter Sellers when he played Chauncey, the gardener. What was it called?

Q: Being There.

BD: Being There ‘cause it was so gentle, it was so, so lovely. That wasn't Billy Wilder, who was that was Hal Ashby...

DN: Yeah, I like Alexander Payne, I like that. I haven't seen the latest film. There's other things that I've seen I liked.

Q: Do you see a lot of new films?

DN: I don't see a lot, as you know. I thought Something About Mary was very funny (laughs) The Farrelly Brothers are pretty funny.

Q: Ms. Danner, do you have a favourite Coldplay track?

BD: Well, of course. The last one was my…I was introduced to Chris after. I'm not very up on rock'n'roll. I am a big jazz buff, so it has been an education but certainly this last album was just beautiful. Now he's working on a new one.

Q: In looking at Gwyneth Paltrow, one can see why she's as beautiful as she is, but do you also do yoga or diet or exercise?

BD: She has my husband's wonderful family cheekbones, those wonderful movie star cheekbones. She didn't get that from me. She's actually the one who started me doing the macrobiotic diet which is very helpful. Yeah, I find I could fly more easily without all those, that milk in my sinuses. It helps.

Q: Mr. Roach talked a little bit about your relationship with the babies, but could you tell us how much did the twins love you?

DN: Well, the kids were good. It's terrifying for little kids to be in a movie. It's terrifying for adults some time, you know.  And so...

Q: Did they know who you were by the way?

DN: No, they (laughs) didn't. They didn't care either. One of the guys was crying more than the other one and then we had a third kid who was used as a double for profile shots, and the back of his head so he was terrific. The kids were very sweet kids and we got through it.

Q: Jay Roach was saying that he thought that as an actor you quite like props. A baby's not a prop, but do you quite like these sort of wild card things?

DN: Yeah. I don't mind that. With the kids you never know what you're going to get and, they also did second unit with the kids, all the sign language, which they spent a lot of time, as far as I know, doing that. But, no, the kids were great. You know, the cats were good and the dog. I mean it's, those are all unpredictables.

Q: Jay Roach actually mentioned that you like having something like a cat or whatever to take your mind off the dialogue. How does that work for you?  

DN: Well, if you have some another task that can take your mind off of what you're supposed to be doing, so you're not just directly doing whatever it is.

Q: How much does the phrase "Are you talking to me?" follow you, like two years ago on a TV show Inside The Actor's Studio the host James Lipton tried to get you to say the phrase which you refused to do, which is very understandable…

DN: Right.

Q: So do people still yell it out to you or come up to you and ask you to say it?

DN: Yeah, sometimes people will say it. I sort of avoid it somehow and deflect it. But I did do it in Rocky And Bullwinkle.

Film: © 2004 DreamWorks LLC And Universal Studios. All Rights Reserved. Packaging: © 2005 DreamWorks LLC And Universal Studios. All Rights Reserved.

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